Wednesday, April 16, 2014

fetch me a paddle

Lately, hopes have risen high, only to be dropped back down again with a thud. We have this crazy adoption. We have these hopes for next year. We have these plans about how it "should" go.

For you visual learners, we have this:

Image shared by JD Huitt of Hallowed Ground Outdoors

So here we are. I picture us in that valley of water (above) without a paddle in our boat. We can still reach the end, but we will have to be daring.

The delegation that planned to visit the US to see our awesome adoptive families...they aren't coming, at least for now. DGM will not allow it. At least for now.

We had such great hopes for this visit. But we wait again. At least for now.

The adoption decree we hoped to have in our hands by now. It's not here yet. We hoped to officially be a family of five by now. But we wait. At least for now. (Just so you know, I am still praying for good news by Friday. After all, we did receive great news that we could go HOME with Brody on Good Friday 2011. Why not make it Good Friday again? That would add to the goodness of Good Friday, indeed.)

The hope we had for next year: Less stress, less worry, more time for our kids, more time for others. That hope was in our hands. We had everything but a formal contract. I was making plans. (Maybe I shouldn't have been making plans--counting chickens before they hatched--but I couldn't resist the thought of a less stressful future.)

No contract came. Instead, a closed door. But maybe an open window.

So we wait again, at least for now. Because, honestly, we know there's a plan that we don't know now. (Try wrapping your head around that one.)

So what shall we do? 

"And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not." (Galatians 6:9)

"Count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing." (James 1:2-4)

Dear Lord, please do not let us faint. And help us to count this wait as joy. We trust your plan. 

"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end." (Jeremiah 29:11...one of my favorites)

But maybe I'm being melodramatic in my weariness.

After all, I've always liked a good adventure. Someone fetch me a paddle and a granola bar.